Being a parent is most definitely one of the most important patience tests. They say patience is a virtue, it is true – but this comment makes you think patience is a quality that only a few chosen ones have. In fact, patience is learnt over time even if some parents don’t do well on this chapter at first. But, with a little effort, any parent can learn to be patient and to amuse himself over some situations that not so long ago annoyed him.
Firstly, you have to learn to have patience with yourself. Do not blame yourself for everything and show tolerance – without falling into the trap of self-content. Happily for children, adults are mature persons and know, most of the times, to keep their nerves under control. Don’t raise your voice and impose your wills with a calm but firm tone, no matter the problem.
Generally, try not to think about tomorrow and don’t let yourself become overwhelmed with perspective problems. Focus only on immediate problems, because if you do otherwise you will only worry a lot more and you will get upset easier.
A lower stress level will definitely inflict more patience on your side. Also, try to explain the child, calmly, what is it you are expecting of him and the ways he can rise up to your expectations. Restrain from blaming him. And if we already are on the subject of expectations, it is essential not to ask of him more than he can give you, based on his age.
Children sometimes seem to try on purpose to test the limits of their parents’ patience. If you fell this is what your little one does, ask yourself what might push him to this. Maybe he is trying to cover some frustration, maybe he wants revenge for a moment when you were unfair or maybe he feels neglected and he’s only trying to get your attention.
Maybe it would be best if you look at the problem from his point of view for a change: if he won’t learn to be himself a patient person, then he probably won’t try to help you anyhow on this.
To make your child become a patient person you can:
- Play with him interactive games – this will teach him to wait until his turn comes.
- Read to him thick books and long stories, leaving to follow-up for the next evening. Do not give in to his pleads to find out the ending in the same evening.
- Teach him to plant a tree or to take care of a flower – then he will learn to be patient until he sees the results of his work.
If he wants a bike, give money, a little a time, and tell him to save them for that bike. Of course you will be the one that will give him the present, but your child will learn to have patience and, at the same time, the value of money.